A question of size

My Intimate Guru's Inbox

So i have a question :)
what do you do when a guy's really nice and every thing's lovely but the size of their penis means it does nothing :)

Thanks for the question, a good one and one that is often worried about by both sexes. The age old answer has always been “size doesn't matter”, well of course this is absolute nonsense, it matters when its “our” size we are talking about! So in order to answer the question i decided to do a little research and find out exactly what is the size of a normal penis, and found this was quite difficult to answer, as the penis changes size on a regular basis, i.e when aroused, when cold, at different times of the day, and also, the penis in its flaccid state may not represent its size when erect for example; A flaccid penis that looks large may be roughly the same size when erect as a flaccid penis that looks smaller. After some googling I found an actual measurement guide;

Average penis length (flaccid): from 3.4 inches to 3.7 inches (8.6 cm to 9.3 cm)
Average penis length (erect): from 5.1 inches to 5.7 inches (12.9 cm to 14.5 cm)
Average penis girth (circumference when erect): from 3.5 inches to 3.9 inches (8.8 cm to 10 cm)

So does penis size matter to women?..A survey of 556 women between the ages of 19-49 asked participants whether penis length and girth matter. The findings included:
18% said penis length was very important, 22% said penis girth was very important
57% said penis length was somewhat important, 53% said penis girth was somewhat important
25% said penis length was unimportant, 25% said penis girth was unimportant
I guess the median view is that yes, penis size is “somewhat” important to women , but the jury is out on whether that's in length or girth. During my research i found another slightly more interesting Canadian study that looked at penis size from a more erotic stance, they had women read erotic passages and rate them on the steaminess of the passage. The only thing they altered was the size of the penis. While some respondents did score the larger penises to be hotter, the differences were not statistically significant. Indicating that in a fantasy realm at least, bigger may not necessarily mean more arousing and penis size may not matter as much as other things.

Does penis size matter to men?..There is no question that this is a huge worry for men, young and old alike.. so i googled some statistics just to try and find out how big a worry it really is;

An Internet-based survey of 52 031 heterosexual men and women found that while 85% of women were satisfied with their partners’ penis size, but only 55% of the men were satisfied with their penis size.
Several studies that have asked men to evaluate the size of their penis, compare it to “normal” and then have actually measured their penis size, have shown that most men underestimate the size of their penis, and overestimate what is an average penis size.
Studies have also shown that men tend to compare penises in a way that is likely to end up with negative evaluation (i.e. they compare flaccid penis to an erect penis).
One study of men who were seeking penile enlargement surgery found that most of the men had penises that were in the average size range, despite their belief that they had unusually small penises.

So in conclusion men think penis size matters more than women...(incidentally this is also true for breasts, women think breast size is far more important than men do...men just love our breasts ladies no matter what size or shape)

Now lets look at a little more factual information this time about the women and how we have orgasms here is an abstract taken from a study by a person named Hoch Z. And its says:

We studied vaginal erotic sensitivity as part of the evaluation and treatment process of couples complaining of female coital anorgasmia (inability to have orgasms) but readily orgasmic at self or partner-performed external genital stimulation (clitoral masturbation). The existence on the anterior vaginal wall of an anatomically clearly definable erotically triggering entity, termed "The G Spot", was refuted by our findings. The entire anterior vaginal wall, including the deeper situated urinary bladder, periurethral tissues and Halban's fascia, rather than one specific spot, were found to be erotically sensitive in most of the women examined, and 64% of them learned how to reach orgasm by direct specific digital and/or coital stimulation of this area. All other parts of the vagina had poor erotic sensitivity. This supports our conceptualization of a 'clitoral/vaginal sensory arm of orgasmic reflex' including the clitoris, the entire anterior vaginal wall as well as the deeper situated tissues. Instead of looking for a 'vaginal (coital) orgasm' distinctly different from a 'clitoral orgasm', this concept speaks towards Vaginal erotic sensitivity by sexological examination.
Hoch Z.



So finally lets answer this question, If this guy is really nice and everything seems to be going well and you are feeling comfortable together but are worried that his penis will not be able to give you the satisfaction that you have experienced to this point in life...I think you are lucky you are about to enter a new era of discovery and exploration. Making love is not about size or shape or even totally about orgasms, Its about closeness, warmth, sharing and comfort. And if you are feeling those things then you can both learn the pattern of each others body's... Where in your body is there a point that when he kisses it or licks it or caresses it you will be begging him not to stop? What part of his body, when you touch it gently with your finger tips or a feather, do you hear him sigh quietly? What if he does two things at a time with his lips and his fingers? How do you feel? How will you guide him? Take it in turns to discover new things about each other. An orgasm takes between 5 and 20 seconds to be over, the journey to the orgasm can take hours and hours. In the light of that I am not sure that the size of his penis is so important, there is much more to sex than penetration and “wham, bam, thank you ma'am” sex is very unfulfilling